While most athletes will connect their confidence to what they feel, the best way to build and maintain unshakeable confidence even in the biggest moments, is to instead place it on what they do. And I’m not talking about how many goals they score, how fast they can run, or how many perfect games they pitch.

Self-confidence needs to be built before they even show up to the game to do those things.

One way most athletes will fail themselves when it comes to believing in their abilities during games is by allowing elements that are outside of their control to penetrate their mindset.

Our feelings and emotions shift frequently. If we show up with low self-confidence, the performance we give on the field, court, or ice will reflect that.

Consider all of the things that can happen during a game that you have no control over, but that you allow to lower your self-confidence.

Playing time: Athletes can influence it by doing their best, but at the end of their Coach makes the final decision.

Opponents: Maybe the other team is more talented, maybe they had a lucky game. Either way, it's not in the control of the team they are up against.

Environment: There's no controling the fans, the weather, the noise levels.

Officials: Nobody will ever agree a hundred percent with how a game is called, and it's an athletes job to respond to the circumstances in an advantageous way.

Injuries: Athletes might be as physically prepared as they can be, but they can't control if someone else knocks into them the wrong way.

Now, instead of focusing on the things you can't do anything about that produce negative thinking, think of all of the things you can control. This is what confident people build resilience around.

Here are three main elements that every athlete should focus on, in order to build confidence that they can keep throughout the season:

1. Body Language

Stand tall, keep your head up, and maintain eye contact. Your posture and physical presence significantly influence your mental state. When you present yourself with confidence, you start to feel it internally. Your body language can create a powerful feedback loop, reinforcing your self-belief and projecting assurance to others.

Stand Tall: Good posture not only makes you appear confident but also helps you feel more confident.

Eye Contact: Maintaining eye contact shows assertiveness and can help you connect better with your teammates and coaches.

Controlled Movements: Move with purpose. Confident athletes are deliberate in their actions.

2. Self-Talk

Be intentional and specific with your self-talk. The way you speak to yourself matters. Replace negative thoughts with positive affirmations and constructive feedback. Instead of saying, “I hope I don’t mess up,” say, “I am prepared and ready to perform my best.” This shift in language can make a significant difference in your mindset.

Positive Affirmations: Regularly tell yourself things like, “I’ve got this,” or “I am strong and capable.”

Constructive Feedback: Focus on what you can improve and how, rather than dwelling on mistakes.

Consistency: Make positive self-talk a habit, not just something you do before a big game.

3. Preparation

Be as prepared as you can be. Confidence comes from knowing you’ve done the work. Whether it’s physical training, mental rehearsals, or strategic planning, thorough preparation helps you feel ready and capable. When you know you’ve put in the effort, it’s easier to trust in your abilities.

Physical Training: Consistent practice and conditioning build your physical readiness.

Mental Rehearsals: Visualize success and practice scenarios in your mind.

Strategic Planning: Understand your game plan and your role in it thoroughly.

By focusing on the three main elements of body language, self-talk, and preparation, every athlete can show up with confidence and maintain it throughout the season. Stand tall, keep your head up, and maintain eye contact to influence your mental state positively. Be intentional and specific with your positive self-talk, replacing negative thoughts with positive affirmations and constructive feedback. Finally, be as prepared as you can be, knowing that confidence comes from the process, not the outcome.

Embrace these strategies, and you'll build a foundation of confidence that supports you through any challenge, ensuring you perform your best when it matters most.

Coach Kristin Tullo is a certified mental performance mastery coach that has worked with athletes as a team coach, a strength coach, and a mental performance coach over the last 10 years. Her signature coaching program, Think Strong, Play Strong helps athletes focus on the controllable elements of goal setting and building confidence so that athletes can dominate physically and mentally this season.

Book a call with Coach Kristin and start learning strategies to become more motivated, disciplined, and focused as an athlete and leader.